A few things this week:
1) This month was my first month hosting CMTO where I did not have a panic attack all week the week before. I owned it. I feel like I’m finally starting to hit my stride, and also dispel this horrible underlying feeling of impostor syndrome. I am starting to feel like Kyle made the right decision by handing over the chapter to me. And it feels really good.
2) This week, run days were really hot days. Part way through my runs, my shirt felt heavy and gross and sticky, and instead of enduring it, I took it off. Why? BECAUSE FUCK IT. Dudes take their shirts off all the god damn time, and I refuse to feel uncomfortable and too hot all summer long because as a woman I worry about my abs and love handles. Not that men don’t worry about those things too, but SO many of the dudes that I run with will take off their shirt on hot nights in the summer, and none of the women do. This summer, I am owning it. Instead of investing in whatever sports bras PLUS some technical tanks, it’s just cute sports bras all the way. It’s TITS OUT running this summer. (Not actually tits out, but you know what I mean).
3) I FINALLY got around to taking care of most of the little details that were making my room still feel un put together and look shabby. I made it out to IKEA for more curtains, got my copper curtain rods cut to proper length, and found some bench storage for my bay window. PHEW. Now I just need to set up my desk in one of the house office areas, and I’ll be good. We also had our housewarming this weekend, which was super fun and lovely. Hurray!
Vancouver pals would hate to hear me say this, but Toronto is really feeling like home these days. The kitties are settled. I love my house and roommates. I have a few amazing communities that I’m really a part of. And I’m getting to know my new neighbourhood. Once this job situation is tackled, I’m golden.
I seem to have a million blog post ideas that I want to cover during the hours when I am not sitting here in front of my laptop, and then when it comes time to write, they all melt away into oblivion. Clearly I need to start taking notes.
This past week has been full of meetings, and productivity, and good talks, and hangouts, and dates. And I remembered that I love/hate dates so much because they are exciting and fun, but also confusing and horrible. Right? I hate having to think about this shit.
We’re ramping up for another CreativeMornings event at the end of the week, and it’s nice to be back at it after much to long of a break between events. It’s gonna’ be a good one.
What else… A friend/CMTO colleague is running her first half marathon in Calgary this upcoming weekend, and I sent her off with a card to open the morning of her race. I still can’t believe how emotional running races feels. We both almost started crying just by me handing her the envelope and saying what it was for. I’m so proud of her, and I wish so very much that I could be there to cheer her on in person.
Sometimes tiny gestures of kindness make all the difference in life.
This month, I have been totally slacking on CreativeMornings. I wish that it wasn’t true, but it is. The combination of two events back to back, and just a heavy month personally for a number of our org committee members, plus moving to a new home, just completely wiped me out. And i’ve been having a little bit of trouble finding my way back.
So tonight, I finally hunkered down and checked a few things off of my CMTO to do list, and just getting through those things rather than continuing to put them off and become increasingly stressed out about them, has already given me a new wind. It’s funny how that works.
I keep having to remind myself that at the moment, it’s all still a learning process, and I’m still finding my feet as a leader, and not only that, we’re still finding out feet as a chapter. It’s a time of a lot of personal growth, and a lot of figuring out the new balance of my life. It’s been a really incredibly amazing year so far, and it’s only going to keep getting better.
Today I went to see a talk by Roman Mars of 99% Invisible, with some of the other women from CreativeMornings Toronto. It was pretty much the best ever. Roman Mars has such a gift for storytelling that shows the beauty and wonder in the everyday. He is such a gifted speaker, with a calm, silky, measured tone. He has a way of making one feel incredibly excited about, and interested in, a topic without becoming manic or dramatic in his manner of speech.
Anyways, it was just such a treat. The talk was put on by Format, so THANKS FORMAT.
This was followed by a few drinks and foods at Bar Raval with a couple of the lovely ladies from Parkdale Roadrunners, and holy shit is that place great. Really lovely, beautiful atmosphere, that has more of a european vibe. And also, HOLY HELL, the tomato toast. Tomato toooooooooooast!!! We ordered it based on the bartender’s recommendation and it was probably my favourite out of everything we had. And it was only 3.50. It took me back to spending long summer days out on the water at my friend’s lake cabin and running in briefly in the afternoon only to make a quick tomato and mayo on toasted rye sandwich. THE BEST. But this was better. The mushroom towers were also the most delicious.
FINALLY, I came home to find that my roommates had completely unpacked/set up all of the common areas in our house. So it finally is really starting to look a lot like a home. Hurrrrrraaaaaaaaay.
And now it’s time for sleeps.
Once again writing a last minute-y day cap type post at the end of a long-ish day.
Do I maybe have to become a morning person to get these done in a less hasty manner? Or would that just mean that the hastiness would be all “guess what I had for bfast today? eggs and toast again! grabbing a coffee en route to work. have a nice day, folks!” Maybe.
Today was a good day of things taking a bit more shape. CMTO meetups starting to tackle our whole speaker process and giving it more structure. Plus, CMTO sleepover where we’re going to be Skyping into other chapters around the globe to say hello and check out how CM is done in other cities. All in all, thumbs up to Thursday.
Sooooo… it’s pretty late, and I’m getting up early to do a long run tomorrow morning, so I’m going to keep this post pretty brief. This morning was my 4th event hosting CreativeMornings Toronto, and I love it so much. Despite my nerves, or the fact that I know that we still have so far to go before we’re where I’d like us to be, just as they are right now, there events, and this community are so great. I’m surrounded with the most talented, caring, hard working people, and I am so fucking lucky.
And for today, that is all.